Art Is A Journey

I know, that does sound cliché and I could probably use another word besides journey for my title but that is what art is….it’s a journey.

It has its ups and downs, it has its adventures, there are dry times and then there are the prolific times. That’s what creativity does, it takes you on a journey.

Lately this journey has taken me to some interesting places where I’ve been dong prophetic art for others. This has been such a fulfilling experience that I could not have imagined for myself, yet my own personal arty pursuit moments were making me feel a little frustrated. I even have been struggling to write words in my journal and have been annoyed at such inspirational lack.

So what did  do to fix this little conundrum?……besides looking at Pinterest! (which sometimes is not wise as it can make one even more frustrated by ones lack of action).

Well it all started with the Book Thief .

In one part of the story, Max the Jewish bloke who was hiding out in the book thief’s basement used the pages from Hitler’s Mein Kampf and then wrote his own story on the whitewashed pages. I know for a long time that artists have been working with old books to create wonderful pieces of work, however for me I’ve never gone there because I’ve had an issue with wreaking a book.

A couple of days ago I decided that it was time to get over my issue and just follow my inspiration.

I purchased two old books which came to $4 and I also purchased brown paper lunch bags because it’s all about following the inspiration. I then went and sat in a lovely space and commenced my “getting over my issue”.

I then went home and continued with my inspiration flight and did this

I’ve since added a few more pages and have constructed a book. Following this approach has been a huge relief and I can’t wait to see where it takes me. Lets just say my clogged up brain suddenly could see many open doors to more creativity and as a result of that awesome thought I drew this.

So what is my little takeaway message here? Go with what is nagging at your inspiration muscle, as you will feel so much better when you do and you never know where the journey will take you next.

The 22Q Adventure

When my son was 18 months old we were introduced to VCFS aka 22Q.dil.11. Now that was a big shock!!!! He was born with a soft cleft palate that was repaired at 6 months and a heart murmur was detected. Never would I have thought that there would be anything else to come up and bite us in the bum. Ouch!!! What the heck is VCFS????? 

He is now eight and life had been an unexpected adventure. These are some of the highlights

Orr look at him receiving an award when he was in kindergarten

 

Oh look, this is a painting that I did in response to being thrust into the VCFS journey 

Awww look at him hugging the washing machine.

Such a sweet photo of my son and his Grandma behind him….notice how he is reaching his hand behind him so that he can have Grandma hold his hand.

I just love this picture

Us in the paper creating awareness

Looking quite dashing in his specs

Here he is picking up all of the cigarette butts from the ground. It became an obsession.

Getting rather excited with the fireworks set up!!!

Cheeky face

Too exciting…a train trip!!!!

Arh, the happiness……army clothes, a toy grenade and a trip on the elevator.

Life is good for a child with Q22

I have written a lot about VCFS and if you would like to read more of our journey here is the link 

 

Hey Brother

I’m soooo loving this song right now. I can’t stop playing it and I’m driving both my husband and son crazy (mummy, that’s giving me a headache)

Besides being a really catchy tune I think that it’s a special song. Firstly this song was playing when I went on the cruise with my coffee group. How awesome it felt going under the harbour bridge with everyone in the party mood with this song playing.

 

 

Secondly, I’m finding that the lyrics have a special meaning to me

Hey brother! There’s an endless road to rediscover
Hey sister! Know the water’s sweet but blood is thicker
Oh, if the sky comes falling down, for you
There’s nothing in this world I wouldn’t do

Hey brother! Do you still believe in one another?
Hey sister! Do you still believe in love? I wonder
Oh, if the sky comes falling down, for you
There’s nothing in this world I wouldn’t do

What if I’m far from home?
Oh brother, I will hear you call!
What if I lose it all?
Oh sister, I will help you hang on!
Oh, if the sky comes falling down, for you
There’s nothing in this world I wouldn’t do

Hey brother! There’s an endless road to rediscover
Hey sister! Do you still believe in love? I wonder
Oh, if the sky comes falling down, for you
There’s nothing in this world I wouldn’t do

What if I’m far from home?
Oh brother, I will hear you call!
What if I lose it all?
Oh sister, I will help you hang on!
Oh, if the sky comes falling down, for you
There’s nothing in this world I wouldn’t do

After much jiggy jigging when listening to this song I have really come to appreciate it with more depth as I finally listened to the words. It makes me think of the special people who surround me and who add value to my life. Family and friends who lift me up and make this journey a more joyful place.

I thank God for all of my groups that have filled in so much of the grief where my mum is missing. Thank you friends, you know who you are. Apologies if I haven’t included a picture of you, I have tried to represent you all xxx

A Word in Season

Yesterday my stat’s went a little crazy as I decided to share this post that I wrote about two years ago. When I wrote it, I was in a very fragile place and had enough of people telling me how my child’s antics were just normal child behaviour.

Since penning my thoughts way back when, I haven’t really experienced this frustration for some time. Is it because people don’t say it to me as frequently, as the older he gets one can clearly see that his behaviour is nothing like a child his age? Is it because these days I’m a lot more calm about my situation? Who knows, I think the antidepressants are working….Oh, and seeing a psychologist too was pretty unreal…and I haven’t yelled at a man it public for a year now and the eF word has seemed to have made and exit from my general thoughts…..hi fives all round friends!!

Yesterday I was reminded of this topic as I was part of a discussion board with other’s who are effected by VCFS. (I can’t share the link as its private). On the thread there were a number of people who kept on insisting that the vcfs antics of one of the children who was posted about was normal behaviour for all children. 

I didn’t feel the rage of yester year, however frustration was mounting when the mum who wrote the original post clearly articulated her knowledge of the  differences between what a typical child does to one who has special needs and then seemed to go unheard.

This made me realise that my frustrations from a few years back, are being felt strongly today by many of those who are in my situation. As a result I decided to share my post called “But all children do that…..do they really???” and the response has been an awakening experience.

For those out there who could relate to the words I had expressed, it is a word in season just for you. It is my gift as one who goes through stuff and writes about them. Not all things get heard straight away but when the season is right the ears will be there to hear.

So to you my fellow VCFS peeps (and others who could relate to the post), keep being awesome and wonderful and thank you for receiving my written words. Lets not be put off by those who don’t seem to have the ears to hear about our lives. I hope your days are full of understanding and strategies to keep you sane.

All the best my lovelies 🙂

A new Discovery

I’m feeling very inspired right now as I have discovered the lovely Melanie Safka who sang a host of very familiar songs but WHY ON EARTH HAVE I NEVER HEARD OF HER BEFORE!!!!!

One of my favourites is this one; Lay down (candles in the rain)

I first heard of this song in the 90’s when Max Sharam brought it out. The amazing timing of this, was when it came out I had written a song with the same melody just weeks before.

Today I was reminded of this song and the connection that I have with it. I was pleased to discover a beautiful songstress and now I am utterly inspired.

I feel like I am bubbling with excitement and creativity, I am not the best song writer or guitar player but I have passion, I am not polished but I am roar, I am not tidy but I am very interesting and I am a dreamer but I am grounded.

I had dreams that seemed to have gotten lost in the crowd of life, yet somehow I think they may come alive again? I really don’t know everything that I want to say. I’m just excited and feel a release of some sort. I hope that I am making sense lol

Here is a picture of what I looked like when I wrote my song. I think that I was 22.

And I shall Swan About!!!

I have come to the conclusion FINALLY, that being a mum is a full-time job and having a child with special needs is overtime!!!

I am not being a victim here by the way, I am just  finally acknowledging something that should have been acknowledged long ago. My life is full on and I can’t do everything therefore if swanning about in a kaftan in my backyard like some queen bee makes me feel happy then I’m going to do it guilt free!!

From a worldly point of view I am unemployed but in reality that’s just not true. Worldly expectations I think, can be very damaging if you allow the pressure of life to way you down.

Worldly expectations: YOU SUCK

• You suck the life out of living
• You suck the dreams out of people
• you suck energy out of the strongest
• you suck the creativity out of the artist
• you just suck you meanie!!

Who do you think you are? I am living the best life I can and my expectations come from God anyway, which are soooooo  much easier, so worldly standards and point of view; let me describe what I am doing right now,

• I am giving you the bird when I decide to swan about
• I am giving you the bird when I decide to make a teepee in the garden
• I am giving you the bird when I allow my child with a disability play with his ipad for as long as he wants to
• I am giving you the bird when I don’t care about your stupid silly rules
• I am giving you the bird when I decide to do what matters instead of living up to the unobtainable.

It may sound as though I am angry but I’m not. I am just deciding to do what really matters and I will now choose to put my love and energies into the most important people in my life; my family. Those are the people who need me to be strong, energised and happy, therefore I shall swan about feeling sexy and when I am happy my family will be happy.

That is all. Have a good day my friends.

The Nourishment of Joy

Life for me lately has been pretty good and it feels like I have been feasting on the fruit of joy. It’s supernatural, as this is something that I have not experienced before. I know this, as I have always been a happy person who copes through life no matter what happens. The past year has been the exception, but anyone would go nuts with how my life has panned out for the past 7 years.

How did this happen??

All I can say is that hunger to know The Father and spend time in the loving arms of God has increased and every time I take a small step towards God, he takes a big step towards me.

One night I was having a little dance listening to Our Father on YouTube

I was getting into it so much that my engagement ring flung off (it was just like diamonds and gold falling from heaven……not!!).  I then went to bed and the air was alive with the sound of  distant thunder and crickets singing loudly. I saw  lightning and then I saw a vision of me running from a beautiful room and into the hands of God and I was safe.

I feel safe and secure for the first time in ages and I am living it up!!! It is time to obtain my yield and believe what God says about me. I’m going to plant a garden in my back yard and make a teepee, I will get a job and no one is going to underestimate me any more. The time for that is passed. I will love this place where I live like I’m living the dream and my heart will yearn for what is possible. I will be the leader I am called to be and will do it with Grace. This is a great day and I’m eating the fruit of joy that is beyond this world!!!

Feeling Groovy….and really happy too!!

For a long time now I have been having a bit of a break down of some kind. I would say that the beginning of last year I was depressed but the second half has been high anxiety, however I am seeking help and those practical things like medication and seeing a psychologist seem to be working.

Other than those practical things, which are important, I have been getting deeper into the knowledge of the love of God. I am discovering after 23 yrs of knowing Jesus, that the love God has for me is more than I will ever know. I am discovering that there is always more and I will never reach the end of The Father’s love no matter how far I go.

I am discovering that I don’t have to be like a camel in the desert just wondering from one watering hole to the next, that My Father in Heaven has a paradise and longs for me to experience his love daily. I have discovered that I lacked trust in God to be my provider but through this journey I am recognising that every day I need to rest upon his chest.

I am recognising that I do not need to strive but cast my burdens onto Jesus who cares for me, to be still, to rest and to mount up on wings like an eagle and fly under the currents of the Holy Spirit.

Since all this crazy love has been revealed to me in a more deeper way,  I have been having wonderful visions and have been experiencing waves of happiness.  It’s like I have been gobbling happiness down like fruit and as a result I have been doing some quirky things around the house such as, making my living room feel like a tree house.

Yesterday I put green material on the wall and I feeeeeeel gooooooood!!!!!!!!!

Welcome to my tree house

Weekly Photo Challenge: Resloved

It is my resolve to accept help and not sabotage those who are willing to give it.

It is resolved, that I shall put the cape down and say I’m done, bring on all that there is out there for me.

I put my hands up and say I need you God and I need my village.

VCFS

Me and VCFS!

If any anyone knows me then they would know that I am a person who has been effected by VCFS. I had never heard of this genetic disorder until my son was diagnosed at 18 months old; he will be seven at the end of the week. The news came as a big shock soon followed by grief and tears.

The way I have dealt with it has been to embrace the unexpected world that we were thrown into and find out as much as we could about this VCFS aka q22. dil.11.2. Like any normal parenting world, it’s been a journey of many ups and downs with a bit more obstacles in the way.

For the past couple of years at this time of year I have enthusiastically have attempted to create awareness of VCFS in my local community. This year has been different.

Has VCFS worn me out?

No!

VCFS is only a small part of the story that has been unfolding in my life for the past seven years. It’s been a story of breakdowns, bankruptcy, car accidents, child needing surgery to repair soft cleft palate, child with a diagnoses, Mum getting sick, mum dying, my cousin died and my father in Law died. There has been so much and more that eventually it all caught up on me and for the first time in my life I’m on medication for depression.

I’ve been told by many that I need to be kind to myself. How do you do that??

Recently I took a  three-month break from my studies and as a result I kind of got there. I read novels, took long walks, painted at the community garden and started to recognise more of Gods love for me.

When I thought about VCFS awareness week it made me feel stressed so for the first time ever I said “no, I can’t this year” It felt like such a relief to be kind to myself. I have had to just let certain things go and just do the things that give me pleasure.

For VCFS awareness week this year I will just write this little post and hope that those who read it will check out  the VCFS 22q11 Foundation. On the website you will notice a link to Area Representatives. I am from the Illawarra and you are welcome to make contact with me. Don’t do this journey alone because at times it can  really do your head in!!!!