I’m still the same person.

I’m still the same person as I was  a couple of years ago when it appeared as though I had nothing of worldly importance. Just because I now have the appearance  of wealth people do treat you differently. I find this a sad reality, it would seem as though the world is swimming in the shallow end of the pool.

I have a new car , a fancy hair cut and some nice new clothes and because of this I’m having a different experience to what I am used to.  Don’t get me wrong, I’m very grateful for all the complements but I just hope people understand that I’m still the same person. That all this new stuff is just surface and it’s not who I am or what I have to offer.

I think back to the time when we seemed to have nothing and it felt as though we were nothing. How wrong is that thought pattern??? Very wrong!!! At least we had each other and our new child, at least I knew who my real friends were. My faith in God had never been stronger as the darkness moved in on our lives the Light that is Jesus could shine brighter.

I am a person of freedom and I move through this world with the confidence that I am loved by God. I am a happy stranger passing through, enjoying myself along the way. Yes I get disappointed at the reality of the world system, sometimes it has tried to way me down but I cut the ties of appearance worship. I have no room for that in my life at all.

So what has this revelation taught me and what am I do do about it?

When I’m doing life I want to know people for who they are and not what they do or don’t possess. I don’t care if your rich or poor or ugly or beautiful I really don’t care. I want to see you and who you really are.  I know that it would be terrifying for some to reveal who they really are but trust be it’s way better then the ridicules mask that I can see right through.

I really hope to inspire and encourage people to be themselves and come and swim in the deep end of life. trust me there’s less pressure there.

Subtopian dreams

I live  and grew up in suburbia, it’s not so bad,  I had a great upbringing but I have to be honest I’v been a little naive to a lot of things until recently. I lived in a mindset that every one was nice and nobody judged you by the way you dressed or the car you drive or how much money you earn. I know, you think this is very strange everybody knows those unspoken rules of society but it’s true, I really didn’t think that way.

A couple of years ago my husband had a break down and the upkeep of our appearance of wealth went down the suburbia drain pipe, washed out to the sea of helplessness. It was in this time that I saw the judgment of my fellow subtiopian kin.  Seriously if you don’t have the appearance of wealth people look down their snobbish self righteous noses.

It seems that the Jones’s, whoever they are, are the answer to subtopian greatness. For goodness sake who are the Jones’s??? Why are they the leaders in this network of streets and houses, who made them the leaders??? I say stuff the Jones’s, the Jones’s are in debt up to their subtopian eye balls, stressed out and terrified that at any moment now they will be knocked off their suptopian man made pedestal.

Tell me what is it to be great? I find my worth in a God who loves me, therefore finding that same worth in others. To look underneath the noise of gossip and judgment and to see the person through the maze of exterior wealth. I like to see the heart of a person not their shallow masks.

Perhaps I sound preachy but all I seek to be is honest.  I want to express this distaste of this appalling judgment that I and many have been subject too. I want to inspire us all to look deeper and beyond the outer shell and then do something positive about it. Hey I may not set the suburbs on fire with my passionate opinions but at least I can have my say!!!!

Where is Q22?

This is an important painting due to it’s symbolic nature. It expresses my reaction to my son’s diagnoses of VCFS (velo, cardio, facial, syndrome) aka. q22.dil.11.2

This image of the child holding the balloon is very significant. Zach is surrounded by bigger things than himself but his focus is up. He is smiling up at the balloon and the balloon is orange like the sun, symbolizing hope and a sunny outlook.

The D.N.A strips are painted red like blood and incidentally it is a blood test that is required to determine whether or not a person has VCFS

The inclusion of the question “where is q22?” promotes another question what is q22? This then leads to an opening to talk about this common, yet little known condition.