I encourage you all to look up!!
Yesterday I attended the VCFS conference at Childrens Hospital Westmead and one of the topics that came up was “When is it the right time to tell your child they have VCFS?” I really don’t think there is a right or wrong answer to this and really I am only an expert in my own experience and that of my child.
So to tackle this topic I’ll use the authority of my own experience and perhaps it may help some one who reads this come to terms with their own decision on what to do.
Finding out my Son had VCFS initially was quite a shock but as I was able to digest the diagnosis I found my self embracing it as, what else could I do? I also believe that he is my precious gift from God and my son is no mistake at all.
My/our approach so far is we tell him he has VCFS but we say it very matter of factually. At the moment he wouldn’t have a clue what it all means but he just accepts it like the moon is round. I’m sure there will come a time when he will see himself as different and talking about VCFS will be important.
I hope by always being open about VCFS that much of the stigma of it is taken out of what he has. At this stage I can’t say that his reaction will be good or bad but if I can lay a foundation of You have this but that’s OK then perhaps when the lights go on for him that he wont be so devastated by the reality.
We can only do our best and as I’ve said before I’m only the expert for what we do but I hope in a small way what I’ve written offers clarity for some.
I can remember a time when, if I couldn’t find something I would just get off my bum and go look for it. If I wanted to know a location or how to spell a word I would whip out the Gregory’s or a dictionary and turn pages in my searching endeavour. Today, when I find myself in search of something I just say to myself “Just Google it”
It’s so true, I’ve become so stupidly depended on Google that when I can’t something tangible in the house my brain immediately want’s to do a word search on the item!!!! As if that’s gunna work!!!!!! (BTW check out the highlighted link on the word gunna)
It’s amazing how influential the internet has become on my life and the way my brain has been re trained. Perhaps re trained may not be the appropriate word as lazy might be more fitting to describe it?
Oh the woes of this new world, oh how easy is it to search and retrieve things these days, oh, oh, oh, oh!!!!!!……….has anyone seen my keys????
Yesterday when I picked up my child from school I was informed that it was dress up day for book week the following day. I thought that perhaps I wouldn’t have to come up with anything because Zachy never likes to dress up (or so I thought!!) when he pipes up and says “I want to be a train!!”
So that night, I had to whip down to Bunning’s to get a box and with in half an hour I transformed this meaningless cardboard box into a shiny meaningful train!!!!!!
Yay!!! go me!!!!!
It’s so good to see Zachy enjoying his train!!! I am a firm believer that children don’t need a lot of money spent on them to produce fun. Being a community artist for a number of years it has always been my experience that when you give children a cardboard box and allow them to the opportunity to be creative so much fun is to be had!!
Life sometimes can be a little busy and I know it’s a bit of a cliché but stopping the smell the flowers is an important part of life. When I took this photo I was walking to my coffee group. I had a strong fast pace, however when I saw this flower it was time to stop, take a shot using my iphone and give it the Instagram treatment.
By stopping it gave me a chance to enjoy the wonder that this little flower has to offer. It gave me an opportunity to be creative and enjoy the moment.
I always say to my self that I’m the tortoise because I don’t do rushing around very well. I’m not one that can juggle everything and I never pretend to. Life is not a rush for me as slow and steady wins the race and I have learnt over the years to not succumb to that competitiveness of life.
I hope you enjoy my flower.
- When I was a kid I wanted to be on Playschool. I would imagine how much fun it would be to play on the set and do all the fun things the presenters did. At about age 7 I would sit in front of a mirror and make up a story pretending I was in fact, a playschool presenter!!!
- When I was a kid I wanted to be a teacher. I had my little black board that was a Christmas gift from Granny and Pop and I would line up all my toys to give them their lesson.
- When I was a kid I liked to make floor plan’s of a house using all of my toys. Once the creation was completed I would survey what I had made then lose total interest knowing that I’d have to pack it all up!!!!
- When I was a kid I liked making bird nest’s out of the freshly cut grass or create house floor plan’s AGAIN!!!
- When I was a kid I would use a frisbee as a steering wheel and pretend I was driving around every where.
- When I was a kid I would get all my pencils and divide them up by colour and they would be family’s. The kids would catch the bus to school, the bus was often a shoe box or something similar. I would also use shells for this type of play.
- When I was a kid I could pick a dodgy person….nothing much has changed there!!!
- When I was a kid to be an adult sounded boring
- When I was a kid I loved climbing trees especially the mangroves. I had a particular one that was my house, it was two-story and each branch was a different part of my house.
- When I was a kid I would pretend I was a princess and I lived in a massive mansion. It had many secret rooms and some that I hadn’t even discovered!!! I had a mansion for every place I visited or went to. I had one at Granny and Pop’s, the house that Granny owned that was by the river and if we visited someone then their property became one of my mansion’s. My family home was just used for a normal house and had an invisible road that I would journey to my invisible school!!!
- When I was a kid I had fun!!!!!!
Just recently I have felt very pressed to get my son doing some kind of sport. For as long as he could walk he has had excellent ability with ball skills, especially running and kicking a ball.
Being of an absconding nature his running skills are magnificent and I’ve never seen him fall over or collide into anything. It’s like he has a sonar radar and when running through a busy shopping center he has a flow that amazes me. So many people report to me about his ability and if I do not listen to them then my son may miss out on what he is naturally good at.
If it was up to me like my very long-winded title says he would be an artist, However I need to look beyond my own passion and see that my son is his own person. Being a non sporty person means that I’m not really out spotting the talent and recognising it when I see it. As an artist when I see a child showing artistic potential I get very excited and always share my revelation with the parent involved.
For me now the challenge is to provide the opportunity for my son to participate in some sporty activities. I’ve decided that we must try our local Little Athletics so I gave them a call today which made me feel really good. I’m pleased about both the physical and social benefits that will arise from partaking of such and activity.
Even though I have no sporty love I’m feeling rather excited about Zachy doing something that I think he will enjoy and who knows where it can take him!!!!
Today I was in K Mart looking at house stuff when I started to say to myself “I want built-in wardrobes. I want a decent kitchen with great storage. I want a decent bathroom that doesn’t leak water through onto the hallway carpet. I want a garage that isn’t full of holes and leaks when there is heavy rain. I want a landlord who actually gives a stuff….etc etc etc” You get the picture!!
I am not a person who likes to windge but I have my days and I guess today is one of those days. And by the way, the word windge is a word and we use it here in Australia to describe a constant complainer of life!!
You know, I am actually grateful for the house I live in and believe it was a miraculous answer to a desperate prayer. However there are a few things that I feel are starting to grate on my nerves. For the money we are paying to live here, we could have something better just around the corner. It’s this knowledge that has sparked my sudden dissatisfaction and caused me to have an out poring of an “I want!!” episode.
It’s okay to want stuff but when it leads to a life where you are never happy then I would question what it is I am wanting. So what do I really want? I want to be happy regardless of my circumstances. I want my Family to be happy and healthy and glad to be alive. I want a vision from God. I want compassion for other’s and myself. I want to be satisfied with the choices I make in life and have little regret. I want to laugh so hard that I nearly wet my pants. I want to make other people laugh so hard that they nearly wet their pants. I want to feel secure. I want to feel alive.
As you can see, there is a lot of want there and now I ask what do you want and is it attainable and within your grasp? Is it something you ever ask yourself or do you go along day by day not really noticing what you’re feeling.
For myself I’m always checking in with God and I measure my happiness next to what is promised to me in his word. As I attempt to stay within that framework I find that what I want is exhausting compared to doing what God wants. As I reflect on my day I ask God to assist my thinking and turn that dissatisfaction into faith.
Over the years I’ve had a few people believe in me and I am grateful to those who have and always remember who they are. In this post I just want to talk about one in particular who encouraged me to go to Uni.
About 20 yrs ago I was doing a short six month course at TAFE called Understanding Children. I found the course to be a lot of fun and hadn’t realised how passionate I felt about the developing process of a child. Not only did I feel passionate about this topic I also thrived at it and felt that I would like to pursue some type of career in this field. My ideas then were to become a child care worker and do some further studies at TAFE.
One day as I was leaving a classroom at the end of a lesson the teacher called me over and asked me what my plans were after this course? When I answered her she then encouraged me to lift the bar higher and suggested that I go to Uni and become a teacher. She then said “you don’t belong here, you belong over there” and pointed at the University that was across the freeway.
I have to say that I was a little stunned at remark as there was no way ever I could see myself being a person who went to Uni. I think she may have noticed the expression on my animated face as then she said “seriously, you are a teacher go and be one!!!”
After that conversation I did as she suggested and started seeking a way for me to become a teacher that I secretly always wanted to be but never thought I could. I ended up in a bridging course that lasted two terms, its intention was to ready students for Uni life. Although I really enjoyed the course called the Gateway, I felt that it was all a bit overwhelming for me.
I was 22 and had no idea that everyone gets overwhelmed at study but today I am 39 and I am ready to pick up where I left off. As I walk towards my goal of becoming a teacher I think of that teacher who believed in me and saw my potential. I hope that as I have been believed in that I too can be a person who would do and be likewise.
We all need someone to believe in us!!!